Give me some euphemisms...

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Crystal Meth
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Give me some euphemisms...

Post by Crystal Meth » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:55 pm

... for masturbating. :lol

I'd like something less clinical than "masturbating", but less crude than "jerking off." So far, the only one I can think of is "walking the dog" which is too lame to even consider.

Ahem...
You got into this business because you're funny and weird, and you're socially retarded. And because it pays well. - Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock.

:cookie

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Spudd
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Post by Spudd » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:55 pm

spanking the monkey?

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Spudd
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Post by Spudd » Fri Jun 08, 2007 12:57 pm

pleasuring oneself?

waxing the pole?

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Crystal Meth
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Post by Crystal Meth » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:02 pm

Hmm... more spanking the money than pleasuring yourself. It's a guy who's a goofball saying it, I don't think he'd say "pleasuring yourself." :think

The lines I get stuck on never fail to surprise me... :lol
You got into this business because you're funny and weird, and you're socially retarded. And because it pays well. - Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock.

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Spudd
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Post by Spudd » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:06 pm

I googled since my brain stopped working. You should be able to find something in one of these pages!

http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/in ... sturbation

http://www.spankerchiefs.com/def.htm

Common slang terms for masturbation: jacking off, jerking off, wanking, whacking off, beating off, spanking the monkey.

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Crystal Meth
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Post by Crystal Meth » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:07 pm

I think I'll use spanking the monkey. Don't worry, you'll get full credit. :lol
You got into this business because you're funny and weird, and you're socially retarded. And because it pays well. - Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock.

:cookie

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Spudd
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Post by Spudd » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:08 pm

LOL, I'll be famous!

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Post by Beana » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:12 pm

"double clicking your mouse" (from American Pie!) I cannot take credit!

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Crystal Meth
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Post by Crystal Meth » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:13 pm

OMG, that's like a line from "Avenue Q"...

"Grab your dick and double-click, for porn PORN PORN."

:rofl
You got into this business because you're funny and weird, and you're socially retarded. And because it pays well. - Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock.

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Sílvia
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Post by Sílvia » Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:20 pm

Frankie McCourt kept saying "interfering with myself". Cracked me up every time!

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Malanee
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Post by Malanee » Fri Jun 08, 2007 2:05 pm

From Borat: Hand Party
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Post by Blush » Fri Jun 08, 2007 2:24 pm

R once called it "cranking up the yogurt machine."

Sorry. :sick

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Post by Aly » Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:19 pm

Choke the chicken

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Jax
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Re: Give me some euphemisms...

Post by Jax » Fri Jun 08, 2007 4:17 pm

Crystal Meth wrote:... for masturbating. :lol

I'd like something less clinical than "masturbating", but less crude than "jerking off." So far, the only one I can think of is "walking the dog" which is too lame to even consider.

Ahem...
I'm a fan of "jacking." It sounds more genuine to me.

:lol
"In heaven all the interesting people are missing." - Nietzsche

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Post by Blush » Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:28 pm

I stand corrected. Apparently it's "winding up the one holed yogurt thrower."

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kayley
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Post by kayley » Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:36 pm

Blush, R is hilarious. yogurt thrower? Oh my.

I like the terms wanking and jacking off the best, but I guess Crystal already found her "term of art."

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Crystal Meth
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Post by Crystal Meth » Fri Jun 08, 2007 11:22 pm

Hey, it's art to me. :huffy

Art is self-expression; so is masturbation. Somebody stitch that on a pillow! :lol

Anyway, I'd rather save "wank" as a verb and call people wankers instead. Insulting AND British!
You got into this business because you're funny and weird, and you're socially retarded. And because it pays well. - Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock.

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LauraLowEnd
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Post by LauraLowEnd » Sat Jun 09, 2007 1:30 am

BEST THREAD EVER.

how about boppin' the baloney?

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Marie
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Post by Marie » Sat Jun 09, 2007 9:52 am

Blush wrote:I stand corrected. Apparently it's "winding up the one holed yogurt thrower."
I will never, and I mean never, look at yogurt the same.

:roflmao

I'll second the best thread ever nomination!
"The Internet is for porn!" -Trekkie Monster

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velocirrober
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Post by velocirrober » Thu Jul 05, 2007 7:38 pm

I call it a protein shake.

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