Talk Healthy

Why do men take so long to take a freakin' shit?!?!?!

EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING. Nick has to take a 20 minute crap. And, almost without fail (today is no exception) this is timed so that I can't get into the bathroom for 20-30 minutes during my morning-getting-ready time... thus making me stressed and behind schedule. ARGH!!!! When we move, we WILL have at least 1.5 bathrooms, because this is getting really freakin' old!!!!

I can shit in about 2 minutes... why can't men do that?!?!?!



ETA: On a related note, I REALLY want a bathroom with an exhaust fan!!

I have no clue, but I also have two bathrooms, one even has a window and a fan.

Make sure you look for a house with at least 1.5 if not 2 when you move

Men do take a long time. It's like an event for my father...

weird.

LOL

B

I said something to Alex about that this morning, and he took the hint and took a shit in record time.

Actually, what I said was that yesterday when I was home with Reed (he's sick) and had to go, I had to leave the bathroom door open so he could come in with me...and he (Alex) goes off, shuts the door, and takes a 45 minute shit. He tried to make some excuse, but when it happens on a daily basis, excuses don't work.

He went to the bathroom, closed the door, and came back out about five minutes later.

i KNOW!!! it IS like a huge event. my BF blames it on gastrointestinal weirdness. but it really does seem like every guy does this and i have no idea why. just let it out, wipe and flush. it doens't have to be a big production.

Luke usually is in there for 5-10 minutes tops. It doesn't take him an unusually long time. However, he totally refuses to poop anywhere except our bathroom. We could be across the bay at IKEA or something and he'll hold it for 2 hours. All the while getting increasingly more impatient and tense. By the time we get home he's like running for the apartment. It's really ridiculous. And he gets all defensive, like "I don't bother you about when and where you poop". He won't even talk about it! LOL

Luke WILL take hour long showers. We'll have our plans set and then he goes in the shower and I don't see him for another hour and a half. Makes me so mad.

Annie wrote:However, he totally refuses to poop anywhere except our bathroom. We could be across the bay at IKEA or something and he'll hold it for 2 hours. All the while getting increasingly more impatient and tense.

I burst out laughing so abruptly at this that I spit all over my monitor.

Annie wrote:. However, he totally refuses to poop anywhere except our bathroom. We could be across the bay at IKEA or something and he'll hold it for 2 hours. All the while getting increasingly more impatient and tense. By the time we get home he's like running for the apartment. It's really ridiculous.

YES!!!!!! Only Nick won't hold it.... we'll have to stop what we're doing, come home for him to poop, and then head BACK out for whatever additional errands/etc we want to do!

WTF is up with that?!

Annie wrote:Luke usually is in there for 5-10 minutes tops. It doesn't take him an unusually long time. However, he totally refuses to poop anywhere except our bathroom. We could be across the bay at IKEA or something and he'll hold it for 2 hours. All the while getting increasingly more impatient and tense. By the time we get home he's like running for the apartment.

Yep. that's Jason too. Except that we have an, uh, open-door policy, so even if he takes forever, I can do what I need to do.

(and sometimes I take a long time too )

My DH does the same thing about having to be at home to poop! What's up with that? However, I don't think he takes particularly long about it... but I'm not really sure, honestly!

My husband will poop any where at any time. He has hopped off me while we are having sex to go poop. *shrug* I think he has been in every bathroom in Atlanta.

Me, I am in and out in 2 minutes. I have better things to do than wallow in my crapulence.

Mark takes in a magazine or the newspaper but at least we have 2 bathrooms...but damn when we are in a store and he says he has to go pee well he is in there for 30 minutes...I am not sure why but I think it may be there time and way to relax

Tony is in my bathroom right now...and he's not coming out anytime soon.

geez

B

Annie wrote:Luke usually is in there for 5-10 minutes tops. It doesn't take him an unusually long time. However, he totally refuses to poop anywhere except our bathroom. We could be across the bay at IKEA or something and he'll hold it for 2 hours. All the while getting increasingly more impatient and tense. By the time we get home he's like running for the apartment. It's really ridiculous. And he gets all defensive, like "I don't bother you about when and where you poop". He won't even talk about it! LOL

That is so Cary . He has to go at home. He's very quick about it. And he would die of embarrassment if he knew I just told you guys that. He is very private about that kind of stuff. We definately do not have an open door policy like April and Jason! Some things are better off kept a mystery. My sister leaves the door open when she uses the bathroom at our house, though!

Rachael wrote: My sister leaves the door open when she uses the bathroom at our house, though!

See, now that would weird me out. If we have any company, the door gets closed firmly. If Cary's so private about that, how does he handle your sister?

It totally creeeps him out! I don't want to see it either. Now whenever she's headed off to the bathroom I say "Katrina! Don't forget to shut the door!" My mom and Grandma are the same way. They'll do their business in front of anyone.

Poor Cary!! It must be almost his worst nightmare. I don't even know why we have the open-door thing...I've never had it like that with my family or anyone before, but Jason and I have done it almost since day one. It's weird, I guess, but it's working fine for us!

OMG...I had no idea this was such a guy thing. I thought it was a Bo thing!

I deal with the whole poop at home thing too. I'm with you CL, we used to run out, then have to run back home for pooping then get back out again.

And the sitting in there for 20-30 mins every morning. When we bought our house we had to have more than 1 bathroom, so we ended up with 1.5. Now I want 2 fulls or 2.5 next time around because when he gets ready in the morning he spends ALL his time in there. Sometimes I wish I was a fly on the wall so I could see what takes so damn long. Of course I'd need a tiny fly noseplug though.

He is very private about that kind of stuff. We definately do not have an open door policy like April and Jason! Some things are better off kept a mystery.

I couldn't agree more. That's the ONLY mystery left after a few years after all .

I gotta say I'm jealous of all of you. You guys don't know what a special occasion it is for me to poop. I could never EVER go anywhere except home, and I need to know I have plenty of time. If I know I have to leave the house soon, forget it. NOT gonna happen. But I *am* quick once I'm in there.

Why is it that the poop threads are always the most popular?

Since having Julian, it's become a special occasion for me, so I've started to sympathize with Bo, a bit. LOL I like the private time I get in there, noone will dare bother me, and I can surf the internet on my PDA, read a magazine, do a Sudoku, whatever. So I guess I've started to become guilty of longer poop times. I used to be in and out in 5 seconds.